"Dear Me" to 11 year old Me

Dear Me Letter
The NAGC sent out a call for letters from those who experienced childhood breavement. The letters were to be written to their younger self and hopefully show today’s grieving children and teens that there is a future ahead.

The following letter's author is anonymous. 


Dear Me:

Losing my father was one of the most difficult things that happened to me. Now that I have adult children of my own (my middle son is now the age of dad when he died), I can remember that horrible day just after my 11th birthday...dad lying on the floor, clutching his heart...mom leaning over him trying to help. That is a memory that I never wanted to keep, but can't help it.

I remember thinking: Who will take care of me? Will me and my sisters be ok? I knew that my family was always around, but it would have been nice to hear my mom (or someone) say, "Don't worry. Someone will always be here to take care of you and your sisters. You will never be alone." I find myself telling this to my own children now.

The best thing about losing my father is that I can relate to others. Friends and neighbors who lost parents have a special connection with me. I can reassure them of all the things I know they must be thinking...things that no-one ever told me.

Although the pain of losing my father has never gone away, I remember the good times and know that I am a stronger person. I have the gift of experience that others can gain support from and lean on.